


I Don't Wanna Play Anymore

by Paper_Sunflowers



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Abandonment, Adventure Time Song Lyrics, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst and Feels, Don't Like Don't Read, Emotional, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Fuck Pink Diamond (Rose Quartz), Gen, Heavy Angst, Hurt, Hurt No Comfort, I'm crying, Other, Pre-Canon, Song Lyrics, Song fic, my heart hurts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-03
Updated: 2019-09-03
Packaged: 2020-10-06 12:41:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20507171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Paper_Sunflowers/pseuds/Paper_Sunflowers
Summary: Spinel is all alone without her Diamond waiting in their garden for her.It's been six thousand years, and she's losing hope that her Diamond will come back so she believes a song will help her feel better and might bring her Diamond back to her.





	I Don't Wanna Play Anymore

**Author's Note:**

> This has probably been done before even with the movie being out for not even a day. I've seen a lot of people say this song fits Spinel well and I agree with them. This is my take on what happened before Spinel got the message about what happened to Pink/Rose.
> 
> Another thing you as the readers should know is that I know this isn't what happened with Spinel when she saw the message I just changed it a little. Also, Spinel's mind is broken after so long of being alone that she believes that if she sings for her Diamond like she once did then she'll come back to her.
> 
> If you wanna go follow me for some strange reason, you can find me on Tumblr @paper-sunflower-lane and on Twitter @SunFlower_Paper.
> 
> Please comment and tell me how I did as well as leave kudos!
> 
> I hope you all have a Blessed morning, noon, night, or whenever you're reading this!
> 
> Hugs & Kisses: Sunny🌻💛🌞
> 
> P.s. Please read the message at the end of the fanfiction for a small rant if you wish.

Spinel stood there looking up at the endless, starlit sky before her a forced smile on her face as her arms wrapped around her frame shivering slightly from the cold that she had gotten used to over the last six thousand years.

Her once neat, heart-shaped pigtails were now in a ratty mess with pieces hanging in her face but she didn’t try to move it her eyes glued to the warp pad just like they had been for the last six thousand years. She was going to greet her Diamond the moment she returned and not a second later.

At least that’s what she kept telling herself over and over again as every second she was alone felt like another hundred years that she was alone. She kept the forced smile on her face though not wanting her Diamond to come back to a frowning face.

“You’ll be back any minute now won’t you, My Diamon?” Spinel asked in a forced sweet voice that sounded like it was going to break from the tears that she had been holding back for so long. “You’ll be back and then we’ll dance, and play, and…” She trailed off as her eyes brighten as her forced smile became even wider.

She and her Diamond used to sing so many songs together, her Diamond always loved when she sang.

“Is that what you want, My Diamond?” She asked as she looked at the warp pad that had aged and crumbled over so many years. “A song? Would you like me to sing you a song?” She asked as tears started to well up in her eyes. “Is that how we play the game?” She said as she cocked her head to the side a tear trailing down her face but she quickly wiped it away.

She was trying so hard not to cry not wanting her Diamond to come back to find her crying since she didn’t want to make her Diamond feel guilty or make her feel said. That’s not what Spinel was for, Spinel was supposed to make her happy, not sad.

“As you wish, My Diamond.” Spinel said as she bounced on her feet a squeaking sound leaving her feet as she did so. She stopped for a moment as she thought of a song to sing something that her Diamond would surely love and then she paused. She knew of a song that used to make her Diamond so happy when she sang it, especially when she was sad her Diamond always said that it made her think of Spinel so she figured it was perfect.

“Alright, My Diamond a song just as you wanted!” Spinel said in an overexcited tone as she started to bounce on her feet again her eyes still on the warp pad in front of her. She then stopped and cleared her throat since it had been such a long time since she had sung anything.

After a few moments of making sure she could sing probably for her Diamond, Spinel opened her mouth and began to sing.

** _Let's go in the garden_ **  
** _ You'll find something waiting_ **

She sang her voice ringing out clear as crystal filling in all the emptiness around her and letting her voice echo softly. Her voice had been the only one that she had heard for so long but she didn’t let that bother her as she kept going. As her voice carried around her believing she had found the answer to the game that they had been playing for so long and thought about how silly she was for not figuring it out sooner.

_ **Right there where you left it** _  
_ ** Lying upside down** _

As she listened to her own voice once again she thought about how the song fit her so well. How her Diamond had left her for so long but that didn’t stop Spinel from doing as she was told. She would do anything for her Diamond and she knew how happy her Diamond would be to see her doing a handstand just for her like she always did when she wanted to make her laugh.

** _When you finally find it_ **  
** _ You'll see how it's faded_ **

Spinel had to admit that after so many years she was a little rough around the edges but she was sure that her Diamond wouldn’t mind too much. She had never minded when Spinel got dirty in fact she would get dirty with her. They would swim in the lake together, play in the mud, roll around in the grass and on the ground so she was sure her Diamond wouldn’t mind at all.

_ **The underside is lighter** _  
_ ** When you turn it around** _

Spinel new that after all these years of feeling sad and alone that everything would be alright once her Diamond came back to her. She would feel just like her old self again, happy and bubbly just like she was always meant to be.

_ **Everything stays** _  
_ ** Right where you left it** _

She would always be here for her Diamond her voice got louder as she sang these words making sure that her Diamond could hear her from where ever she was positive that she could.

_ **Everything stays** _  
_ ** But it still changes** _

Of course, she had changed but she hadn’t changed that much or at least she didn’t think she had. Yes, her appearance had changed since she really didn’t have that much time to take care of herself since she didn’t want to miss the moment her Diamond came back but she knew that could all be fixed with water.

_ **Ever so slightly** _  
_ ** Daily and nightly** _

Spinel’s voice faltered as she sang those words tears starting to well up in her eyes once more. She had been here for so long, been her waiting for her Diamond to come back and love her. All those years of wondering if she was playing the came right. Now to come and find out that she had been at all which made her feel so ashamed since she believed she had made her Diamond feel like she didn’t want to be her’s anymore. That could all be fixed now and her and her Diamond could be happy once more.

_ **In little ways** _  
_ ** When everything stays…** _

She finished holding back the tears as she looked at the warp pad waiting for the sound that would show her Diamond had returned to her and that they would play and laugh as they did before.

Spinel jumped though when the sound of the Diamond line suddenly turned on causing her to turn her and look towards. Her heart was pounding in her chest as she waited to see the face of her Diamond calling to tell her how much she had missed her and how she was coming to get her right now.

But that’s not what Spinel got…

Spinel listened her forced teary smile slowly turning into a frown as tears spilled down her face from every word White Diamond said.

Her Diamond was never coming back, she had left her for not just someone else but another world and another life. She had done the impossible, she had broken Home World law, she had abandoned her, she had abandoned them all, she had started a war, she had given up her life… for her son.

As Spinel listened to all of this tears streamed down her face there was no stopping them as she looked at the Diamond Line screen but she wasn’t just looking at the screen anymore she was looking at the child, the young man that was her Diamond’s son.

Pain filled Spinel’s heart as she looked at the one they called Steven and suddenly something snapped inside of her, something that had been wanting to snap for such a long time.

She could feel her form changing as her emotions, her mind, and her heart darkened with every word that the son, Steven as he was named kept speaking.

Soon Spinel wasn’t like she once was though she hadn’t been that for a long, long time. Her form had changed into a more radical style then what she had once been.

Black lines ran down her face three on each side showing the tears she had left unshed for thousands of years. Her heart-shaped gem turned upside pulsing an angry red color that she had never seen before thanks to a feeling she had been trying to push back for years.

That feeling was hate and it filled her with anger and disgust, her Diamond had lied to her and now she was gone. Now she had no one but if Spinel was being honest with herself she knew she had never had anyone, to begin with.

As these thoughts filled her mind Spinel began to laugh through a gritted smile all the pain she had felt for so long finally breaking her mind.

“I don’t want to play anymore,” Spinel finally growled out a deranged look in her eye as she looked at the message that was now replaying before her hate feeling her once more.

She would make them pay, she would make every last one of them pay.

She would take away their Happily Ever After just like she believed they had taken away her’s.

**Author's Note:**

> Can we all honestly just say fuck Pink Diamond/Rose Quartz I mean she's done more harm then good. I believe the only two good things she's ever done is help Gems realize that they can be more and have Steven. And not even that since she left Steven with all of her problems.
> 
> And yes I did say that what she did to Spinel was emotional abuse because it was. 
> 
> She told her that she was going to come right back and just left her alone with no one! That messed her up so much and it broke so yeah I'm saying it again fuck her and I'm glad Steven is a better person than her.


End file.
